I Have Good Aim I Swear!

I'm going to skip right to the good shit. I pissed on some bitch's shoe. Now, I normally don't do shit like this but she crossed the line...

So, there's a bunch of us in my room. A few of my buddies and these two crazy bitches who are sitting on my bed. I'm standing across the room doing whatever the fuck I do when I'm trashed. This usually consists of my yelling or being retard. Mostly both.

Anyway, I happen to look over towards my bed right after one of the crazy bitches decides to open a beer. She actually got the cap off the bottle ok but then she does the most retarded thing ever, she hits the mouth of her bottle on the bottom of the other bitches beer. Now most of you have an asshole friend who think it's funny to do that shit, but that generally doesn't happen when they're sitting on someones fucking bed.

Sure enough her bottle explodes beer everywhere and there's a huge beer stain on my bed. Now I'm fucking pissed. I really wanted to cunt punt the bitch and thats when her shoe caught my eye. It seemed to be my good fortune that the stupid ass chick decided to go barefoot. So I grabbed her shoe and walked outside.

I get outside toss her shoe on the ground and start pissing. Now, at this very moment I actually felt bad and hadn't hit her shoe with a direct flow of piss, I had mostly covered it with spatter when the chick decides to come up right behind me. While I'm still pissing she asks me if I'm pissing on her shoe. At this point in time, I'm drunk and can't multitask, so in order for me to answer her I have to turn my attention away from the shoe. I tell her no and in the process end up pissing all over her shoe.

High Life owns.

Aftermath: I ended up getting a six pack of Miller High Life tall boys out of the deal from the same bitches that spilled beer on my bed. I also got comfirmation from her that her shoe was still wet when she put it on.